You find out who you are through waiting…

For years I have seen others be blessed beyond measure right before my eyes. I have prayed for others and seen the very thing that I needed… manifest in their lives and not in my own. There were times when I encouraged others and could have used a little cheering up myself. Hear my heart.

Through this process of watching others and waiting for my turn I’ve seen who I truly am. Somehow I managed to focus my eyes on the Kingdom, things above and now the blessings are following, as my life transitions. I have no idea why others were blessed before me or why they didn’t have to wait like I did. I can only tell you about my walk.

Was I ever frustrated? You know it. Of course, in this flesh of ours you get tired of holding on. But that’s a God thing… God had a reason for my seasons and in it I was still blessed. In some areas I am still believing, while sincerely happy for others.

It wasn’t for me to take it out on the people who were receiving some of my hearts desires. I was glad and rejoiced with them. Why? Because that’s what you are supposed to do! You genuinely celebrate as though it’s your own blessing. I truly did celebrate new homes, cars and other good things happening in the lives of those who were around me. Tell me what good is it to get mad at them or stop speaking to them?

I never had ill feelings toward a friend, co-worker or stranger for getting a new purse, new outfit or having a cute hair-do. No, I felt the joy that they experienced. I’ve had people personally come and wave new rings and even designer sunglasses for me to notice and I still was happy for them. Even though they were a little dramatic, but I knew that they had other issues when you have to go out of your way to be noticed. Okay, I can’t drift…that’s another subject there.

But really, what is it that makes people think that I or another sister are NOT supposed to have these things? Is it our job to figure out who’s entitled and who isn’t? Is this what my youngest son would call a “hater”?

I mean really…the looks, comments, “pretending like you don’t see the blessing” and cold shoulders are unnecessary because God is not pleased with that. Remember, whatever you sow, that shall you also reap! Do unto others what you want to be done to you. Right…?

It’s time to lay aside the weights that so easily beset us. In this case, it is pettiness that is stealing your joy. Deal with this and be free.

If you are envious or jealous of others, ask yourself why am I? Why does “this” bother me?

Be real about it. You need to get to the core because you’ll never be happy begrudging and mumbling about another person’s success. It is so much easier to rest in knowing that you are not forgotten. Knowing that it’s okay for others to be blessed, there is more than enough to go around if you are serving God.

Its mirror time…take a look and see what’s truly in your heart.

TruU Experience Conference

Guess what? In January, (I know I’m late ) I made the front page of my local newspaper, The Racine Journal Times! I felt so blessed to be on the front page and on the front of the Faith and Community section of the paper. The article speaks about my book and life of hiding behind masks.

After all the good thoughts, I heard this voice in the back of mind say, “What have you done…all of Racine will know a part of your story?” It was great, embarrassing and scary at the same time if that makes sense to you. Why? Well, first of all, this was my first time going public with the sexual abuse and being at the point of suicide. Second, it’s in print; black and white. Third, I couldn’t believe how candid I was during this interview (God set me up). That’s also the skill of a great interviewer. Being a first lady of a church, this is not the kind of thing you just go around saying. Some would understand just going to church alone you better not think about suicide! So, you know this was God for me.

With this article, there was NO turning back. Let’s roll now…talk about the mask coming off? That was it…the big one!

The reward came when I received the calls, emails and text messages saying, “thank you” or “now I can tell someone that the same thing happened to me.” You’d be surprise what people have gone through that you are in contact with each day. So, with that said, I am thankful to God that I shared. With me opening my mouth telling my story ultimately began the process of healing for others. That’s what it’s all about.

To see the front page pictures and read article click here: http://www.sonyavisor.com/content/media.html

To read the article alone, click here:http://tinyurl.com/y8kkd44